Author Dr. James. A McBean. D.Th., MCC

Copyright © 2008 Library of Congress Washington.D.C.20559

Publisher: Revival Tract Ministries Inc

The purpose of this article: Speaking to men-unborn! I had been writing for ages, and have no special person in mind!

T ommy Newberry In his book “Success Is Not An Accident” He says” Success is not an accident! This is, without a doubt, the single most important lesson you must learn and really understand if you want to develop your full potential and enjoy all the success you were designed to enjoy. Success in life comes from one thing: deciding exactly what you want to accomplish and then deliberately choosing to invest the minutes and hours of your life doing only those things that move you in the direction of your goal. It is simple. It is the truth. And the moment you fully accept it, your life and the lives of those you love will never again be the same. Success, however you choose to define it, is absolutely predictable.”

I saw a man by the sea fishing in New York. I join him; pretty soon, we begin to talk. He had a great marriage, but one day he came home from work and his wife had moved out on him, for five years he had no knowledge of where she was and why she move out. One day after five years, he passes by certain building, he heard a woman call out to him from up top, he knows her, she was his wife best friend. She throws down her keys to him so he opened the main door and went up. She invites him to stay for the night, she told him that his wife move back to Guyana and build a house. When he was making sex with this woman she told him that she wanted him a long time ago but the other woman was in the way. As he made love to her, she keeps talking. Then, he found out that it was this woman told his wife stuff about him and make her leave leave the United State and went home. “Getting her out of the way.”

ANTICIPATE THE PROBLEMS THAT PELAGE MARRIAGES AND DEAL WITH IT EVEN BEFORE IT BECAME A PROBLEM IN YOUR LIFE:

Just like everything else, the success of marriage is based on principles, and not just luck. It is a principle that anybody that learn it can have the same result. Some of the problems that seem to bring down marriages are lunch room gossips.

BOTH HUSBAND AND WIFE MUST HAVE A GAME PLAN AND HOW TO DEAL WITH HEAR SAYS.

To escape the power and traps of gossips a husband and wife have to give their marriage foundations. What I mean by the foundation, is to establish and put certain principles in place that you both are willing to follow. Have a plan and how to deal with hear says. One of the biggest death traps to a marriage is the envious eyes and the long tongues of another woman. Let me give you an example. One woman will tell the other one. “You and your husband are really enjoying yourselves, I saw his car at a hotel” What she is trying to do is to plant doubt in the wife mind as to your husband's behavior, and she is counting on you not to ask him back when you go home, but to go home and act moody, withdrawn, and bitchy. This is going to cause the man to arrive at his own crazy conclusion. He will think that the woman has found a man and is having a relationship on the side.

BEWARE OF WOMEN FRIENDS.

Sirach 42:13. For just as moths come from garments, so harm to women comes from women.

The New American Bible. Saint Joseph Edition. Catholic Book Publishing Company.

Sirach 37:7. Every counselor points out a way, but some counsel ways of their own; be on the alert when one proffers advice, find out first of all what he wants. For he may be thinking of himself alone; why should the profit fall to him?

The New American Bible. Saint Joseph Edition. Catholic Book Publishing Company.

HOW TO DEAL WITH A GOSSIP MONGERS.

You will need to ask the gossip mongers a series of questions starting with the most important questions first. Bear in mind that a gossip monger hardly ever loose, because these first befriend and study the victims, so as to play them well. A gossip monger does not like to see when an older woman gets lucky or hit is big with a man. Sometime it was only a joke or prank, to see how you would react, but that prank set of whole motions of trouble.

(1) What hotel or motel did you see my husband car? (2) What time of day was it? (3) What day was it? You ask one question then talk a little than ask other questions, always pretending as you swallow the boats. If you act like you are in doubt and like you have the gossip monger on trial, she will begin to step backward until she walk away. You do not want the gossip mongers to leave and feel like she has failed in planting doubt and mistrust in your mind. Or poison your head. If the gossip mongers fail, the next step is go and told your husband the same thing about you. One gossip mongers were working over my wife the same way at the same time the gossip mongers are offering to rent me a room in her house.

(4) Did you see my husband or did you saw the car only? (5) Did you write down the tag number? You will need this information because when you reach home you should ask your husband. You most be able to say “Honey, One of the girls on my job make jokes that she saw your car at a motel. Where were you on a certain date, at certain times?" Reader might say, “You need to trust each other” only if it has no effect on your attitudes and emotions. Allegation like this has to be searched out. The husband has a right to know that lies have been told on him, and if he is guilty, he need to know that he as been caught.

DO NOT MAKE A GOSSIP MONGER LOCK YOUR MOUTH

One of the most hurtful things is to be dealing with people who hear something about you, and refuses to say what is the problem, so the things can be cleared up and get the relationship back on track. Say what is on your mind so the problem can be fixed. Do not make the gossip monger told you not to ask back.

FALLING INTO BAD RELATIONSHIP.

A bad relationship is the number one obstacles for marriage Christians. Many Christians continue serving the Lord good, right up to the time when they got married. After the marriage, their faith went down hill. This could have been prevented if they did anticipate the problems and deal with it. You might say "But they do not know what problems that are going to have" There is a list of pitfalls that Satan has that he uses on married people and it is the same old list Satan have for everybody.

Amos 3:3-AV Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

A couple must decide on who is the leader in the relationship, even before moving in together. Somebody will have to be the leader. The president of the United States is there for emergency decisions. Congress can be tied up on decisions for years. In time of war and time of great stress, when an immediate decision is needed, there is no time for long drawn out, and endless debating. The president has emergency powers; where he can get up and say" This is how it must go" The president has to use his emergency powers, until congress can come up with an agreement. Somebody in the marriage has to have that power. The Bible says it is the man must have this power in the marriage.

Ephes. 5:23 (KJV) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body.

Many women do not agree with this, but when trouble came, they run behind the man. James 3:16-AV For where envying and strife [is], there [is] confusion and every evil work.

One of the easiest ways to put an end to the power struggle that seems to kill many Marriages are for the man to choose a much younger woman, that himself. We see in the Bible Abraham was ten years older than his wife. When we were going to school a girl that was our age was much mature that the boys, and would not even listen to us. It was impossible for those girls to be in subjecting to us when we were just idiots to them. So even before the two people move together they must decide on who is the leader in the relationship. Do not assume anything, talk about it, and document it in the premarital agreement.

In the book “Politics and people” Robert Townsend said” All people have needs. The way we act is determined by needs that are not yet satisfied. Our needs form a kind of ladder. Until a person’s needs have been satisfied on a lower level, he or she won’t be interested in satisfying needs on a higher level.”

In the book “Philosopher in Medicine” By Dr. Samuel Thompson. Publisher. Lindsay & Blankiston, 25 South Sixth Street, above Chestnut, Philadelphia. 1850. Page 427, “Gonorrhea”

“The peace of families has in some instances been destroyed, by a wife or husband being affected with symptoms resembling those attending the venereal disease, at the same time the accused party being entirely innocent. Instances have occurred in the which symptoms of gonorrhea have occurred in men, in consequence of the wife being affected with a severe form of fluor albus, or whites, each party accusing the other of infidelity” If the woman has a deficiency of estrogen, she easily falls prey to infections which will also infect her husband, many a family has been broken up over such a thing.