Author Dr. James. A McBean. D.Th., MCC

Copyright © 2006 Library of Congress Washington.D.C.20559

Publisher: Revival Tract Ministries Inc

The purpose of this article: Speaking to men-unborn! I had been writing for ages, and have no special person in mind!

D ealing with good people is not a problem because good people are like that because they are; mature. Nasty people are like that because they were stuck up in the limbo of kid’s stuff. They tell themselves how nice and how pretty they are. The richest man that lives upon the face of the earth got rich because they know how to deal with people, they know human nature, and learn how to use it to their advantage. If you cannot deal with nasty people then really did not learn much. Nasty people can drive you up a while, make you lose your jobs, make you lose your marriage, your home, your family and end up in prison. Nasty people will make you kill them. The first thing you need to know is that nasty people are not nasty, they are in pain. In addition, since they are in pain you should not respond with animosity. Nasty people are a failure to themselves and others and sometime they are pretending to be somebody else, and are living in a utopia of dreamland. For example, a young woman acting as if she has no use for a man, who is she fooling? Might as well she acts like she has no need for food, or no need to have a bath?

The world is full of nasty people. Everywhere you and I go they are there. We cannot get rid of them; you just have to learn how to deal with them. You have to know that nasty people are around; you have to be able to know them within few hours.

When we tolerate aggression it only get worse, when we succumb to difficult people they do not necessarily get better, but sometimes it makes good sense to find a way to deal with them. The Japanese say, “Men despise other men that have qualities that they themselves lack”

Every nasty behavior that people displayed, they do it because something or someone makes them afraid. People can become very nasty when feeling threatened, and feeling inferior to an underdog. Even a minister of religions sometime displayed scared cat mentality, and try to get rid of a prospective minister, who is an underdog. People are scared that other people will take their job, they mate, and their positions. Once people saw qualities in you that they do not have, they condescend to some of the nastiest tricks. Difficult people are more difficult in the job market, and that is the place where you will meet them the most.

THE PROUD AND THE SCORNFULL.

This group of people thinks that they are better than other people. They think that way and they act it. While working with a patient in the nursing homes, sometime the relatives of the old patient came and saw the Nurse or Nurse assistant working with their father/mother They just walk in and pretend not to see the worker. The health care worker is treated like a nobody. This person pretends like the only person in the room is their parents and them. The health care worker must also behave as if the only person in the room is herself/himself and the patient. To deal with the scornful you have to scan them. When you scorned the scornful, they melt down; they can dish out rejection but cannot take it.

Psalm 88:18 (KJV)Lover and friend hast thou put far from me, and mine acquaintance into darkness.

THE WALL THAT PEOPLE SET UP TO KEEP OUT OTHERS, ALSO KEEP THEM IN.

When people show up their bad attitudes you must capitalize on it. Bad attitudes mean you must withdraw from such a person, keep your distance. What do people do when they find themselves standing before a rattlesnake? They run. Scornful people and people who think that they are better than others are nothing more that a rattle snake. They want you to stay away from them and that is what you must do. Do not jump over people fence, nor break down their walls. Watch a woman who thinks that she is better than men, and has a habit of referring to men as dogs, you will be surprised to see the dog she finally settles for.

SMILING COBRAS.

Smiling cobras is somebody that wants to get up the ladder of authority, will laugh up in your face, but at the same time is a danger. When dealing with a cobra you must only smile back, laugh back, but watch your words. If the cobra asks, “What do you think about John” Just be frank and say. I do not think about others. Cobra is a master of words twisting.

Psalm 56:5 (Living) They are always twisting what I say. All their thoughts are how to harm me.

Psalm 55:21 The words of his mouth were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart: his words were softer than oil, yet were they drawn swords.

He/she will tell you that you do not interested enough, but that is a trap. You have to know when you are dealing with a cobra, or else he/she will get you. Cobra is a person you do not want in your corner. However, will appear so friendly that you will even use his or her name on a résumé and they sink you deep down in Dung Street.

Has anybody ever called you and ask about such person? Since you know he/she, have they ever contributed anything to your life? Information or just help of any sort?

Do not put new people in your confidence until you get to know them. Therefore, do not engage in a conversation with others about others until you know what's going on.

These know how to win people over to their sides. If smiling cobras take a disliking to you, and if this person has some authority, you will better off start to plan your leaving. However, do not leave until you find something better. Smiling cobras and a back stabber are also the same person. However, a back stabber might not be smiling cobras. In other word, a smiling cobra has two traits, “he/she is the grand daddy of them all, backstabbing, two faced, pit digging.

WHY PEOPLE FIGHT ON THE JOB?

The reasons for workplace problem are many. However, one stand out above all. “The need for a scapegoat” “ We need to make somebody that everybody hates” On every job, or in every community people always look for somebody to be the fall guy, they look down upon person and they usually find somebody that are of better quality than themselves to make look bad. The person on the job that everybody hates bears all the blames, while the real troublemakers get away. One of my nursing home jobs, some workers went home in the night while still on the clock. Then return two hours later. Nobody is watching that person because he/she is not the fall guy.

WHEN CHOOSEN TO BE THE SCAPE GOAT.

These are some decisive actions you can take up when you discovered that you have been chosen to be the next scapegoat.

DO NOT MAKE PEOPLE CHOOSE THE BATTLE THAT YOU MUST FIGHT.

"In today's fast-paced work environment where everything seems urgent – if not a crisis - it's easy to get caught up in an issue simply because everyone else is so worked up about it. However, according to Dr. Richard Carlson, author of a series of bestselling books on success, one of the keys to a satisfying and productive career - and life - is to choose your battles wisely.

Carlson observes that life is filled with opportunities to choose between making a big deal out of something or simply letting go and moving forward. When you argue over every confrontation, you will be perceived as a troublemaker, but if you challenge only those issues that are truly important to you, your opinions and disagreement will bear more weight and people will listen.

"One of the major contributing factors to self-created stress is the tendency that most of us have to hold on to battles that we have virtually no chance of winning," Carlson writes in his bestselling book Don't Sweat the Small Stuff at Work. He adds that even if you win the wrong battle, you lose, because you have expended energy and effort that could have been put to better use.

How can you tell which battles are worth fighting? Here are some guidelines: When not to fight - You are trying to change people who have no interest in changing. The outcome will not be materially different whether you win or lose. - The matter really is not very relevant or important to you.

You are not fully informed about the issue or fully convinced that your position is correct. - You have no chance of winning. - You have other priorities that are far more pressing. - You are just feeling surly or want to show others you are not a wimp. When it's

OK to fight: - Your ideas are being diminished. - Your reputation is being sullied. - It is for the betterment of the organization. - You are standing up against action that is cruel or illegal. - Something legitimate or terribly important is at stake. - The issue involves integrity. - The issue involves a significant amount of money. "There are times that embracing confrontation is good," says David D'Alessandro, CEO of John Hancock Financial Services. "Don't be mean to people just because you're mean or you're unhappy. Pick a fight when you believe you are right and the stakes are worth it. Even if you lose, you will be respected for having picked the fight.

"Successful people have an uncanny ability to know when to advance and when to retreat. It comes from having a mindset that is oriented toward making things work, not wasting time figuring out why things went wrong. Successful people are realistic, seek responsibility, tolerate ambiguity, and are willing to make decisions and take action. They expect to win. In addition, one of the best ways to win is to choose your battles!

THE JOB SCARED.

You cannot truly deal with people until you categorized them. You have to know what category that person fall in. For example, it is your first week on the job. You try to act nice and try to win some friends.

When a person is scared that your talent or qualities might caught the attention of the boss, how do they behave?

They uses sarcasm, every time you open your mouth, it is meet with ridicules, no matter what you say. It is important for you to know that the sarcasm and ridicules is to make you behave bad, loud, and nasty. Once you do that, you confirm what they already predict of you and you fall into the trap.

They will use bad looks; they start to needle the new worker. If that do not let you cut and run, they go to a more severe tactics, always getting worst each time. Sometime fighting fire with fire is not the best remedy here; troublemakers always first buy the bosses and supervisors out and have them in their pocket and panties. You might have to buy this person out. Find something good about the troublemaker to praise him/her for. Have nothing to say but praises.

Every job has a person who is a “suckup.” Pay attention to a suckup and watch how they do it, you can borrow a few of the suck up skills. To disarm the job scared person, you will have to show him/her that you are not a threat. Note, gossips, and hear says is one of the suck up tools, but you do not have to condense to that. A suck up never speaks their true mind, and people in authority love suck up. A suck up knows when to laugh with the person in authority and on their way home the suckup said he/she was only laughing after them not with them as how it did look. You need to borrow a few tools from a suck up. How often do you see a suck up get hurt? Just remember that a suck up and a bootlicker is one and the same, so you must not become one only borrow a few of their tools.

WATCH YOUR REMARKS AND LEARN DOCUMENTATION.

The Japanese say,” Even no respond is a form of respond” During the time when the person is bothering you, you must be documenting what is being said and done. Also, document your respond. If you are documenting your own respond, you will not make any nasty ones. Planned your defense. Time, date, what was said, your respond, and who was there as a witness. Keep these in a safe place. If you have to complain, you must do it in writing, so the person has a chance to respond, if it is not in writing it is gossips.

If you get loud and nasty like the troublemaker, you have lost the battle; you must be able to see the problem coming and defuse it. Difficult situations are part of everyone’s life. Employers and employees cannot get along, these situations, they always get worse. You have to find the best peaceful way to deal with it. If you attack the person, at least you are trying to fix the problem, but attacks, rage, and irrational anger will only give you a bad name, makes people afraid of you, and reduces honest communication. Disconnecting from the problem and from the person is not always practical. This will cause you to lost employees supporters and friends because you needlessly disassociate from them. This may reduce your stress, but you might also become lonely and poor.

THE BIRD DUNGS KIND OF PEOPLE.

The bird dung and the chip on the shoulder kind of person are the same. This is always trying to pick a fight, throwing his or her weight around. You need to ask yourself a questions before you get into a fight. Who is the one that truly want this fight? Since you are not the one that wants the fight, do not fight.

Work place violence is steadily on the rise in USA, people are upset for every thing. They take their problems to the jobs. Some of the time it reaches a proportion that work place problems played itself out on the street. They take the work place fight to the street.

WORK PLACE VIOLENCE HAS A LOT TO DO WITH WHO IS IN AUTHORITY.

Proverbs 29:2 When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice: but when the wicked beareth rule, the people mourn.

THE PATH OF LEAST RESISTANCE:

In an electrical circuit, current will always follow the path of Least resistance. Because of this, sometimes the current makes its own paths where there should not be any. We call this a short circuit.

People do the same thing, they have aggression and hate bottled up inside them. Some of them get themselves caught up in lifestyles that they hated Because of this, they always feel upset. They will take this upset Spirit right to the job, home and church, and then they will look for Somebody who they think will not give them any resistance and make a Physiological punching bags out the person, if they think they can get away with it. You do not have to be a punching bag nor a doormat, and you do not need to fight fire with fire.